I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
