Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
