Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
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