she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize
