Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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