i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize