Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
