Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
