this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
