I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
