u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
