Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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