So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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