I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
