Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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