I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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