there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
