She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
