i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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