Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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