So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i barfeds in our rink
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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