oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
