are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Just pee around me
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
