I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
