nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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