and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
