playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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