just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize