How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
