I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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