My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
