he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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