i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
