Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize