Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
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