Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
