Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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