I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
