is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
