Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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