Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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