Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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