Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Randomize
