Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
