I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize