there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
