She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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