how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
