8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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