Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
