More tranny stories later!
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I faked an abortion last night.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
